Invaiders-Beaters battle should be clash of the titans

Odds are even for Silent Division leaders; Tirades get early Christmas gift as Dalvin Cook returns; Saddles and Rangers take early leads

Dalvin Cook returned in a big way: 205 yards, two TDs and 33 points for the thankful Tirades.

Matt Pringle's Spread Beaters, fresh off an upset loss to the (really?) Band Aids in which his team did not even manage 50 points, look for a huge rebound this week as they fight to regain a share of the division lead against Vern Ahrendes' Invaiders, who hold a slim 2-0 lead after Thursday night's action.

That slim lead is due to a ho-hum performance from Invaiders TE Tyler Conklin. What was not so forgettable was Dalvin Cook's return at RB for the Tirades: he cut through the porous Steelers "defense" like a hot knife through butter. After a single week off to recover from a dislocated shoulder, Cook was shockingly back in the lineup Thursday night and scored 33 points (coincidentally, his jersey number) to give the Tirades an early edge against the Packers. Here's a look at this weekend's action....

Invaiders (even) vs Beaters: This one is impossible to call, just as their last meeting, way back in Week 5, was as well. In that one, the Invaiders squeaked out a 105-104 win thanks to two late fumbles by Beaters QB Lamar Jackson... the latter one on his way to the end zone for a TD that would have won it. Based on that, and the fact that the Beaters are underdogs and we love a good underdog story, the JSFL Today staff is leaning toward the Spread Beaters to do what they're name suggests... and beat the spread. Sure, Kyler Murray is back and yadda yadda yadda.... we look for Lamar Jackson to redeem himself here and put this division back into a deadlock, for one more week at least. Beaters by 3.

Tirades (-13) vs Packers: So the crack JSFL Today staff was ready to favor the Packers by 10 in this one, but then the pre-Christmas miracle happened: Dalvin Cook returned to the lineup and shredded it on Thursday night. That throws things for a loop, right? Not really. As with every other Tirades game this season, it will likely come down to this: WWMD? As in What Will Mahomes Do? Will he run for a touchdown in the first quarter and then take the rest of the game off, like he did last week? Or will he go nuts and throw five TD passes? It's been feast or famine with him. The Packers got a respectable 12 points from the Vikings kicker last night, and that's with a a missed FG and a missed XP. They also have their backfield back: Aaron Jones and David Montgomery will both go this week and do it in the same game. The Tirades, hoping for some anti-Montgomery juju, have picked up the Packers defense for the weekend. That, of course, should backfire. Packers by 3.

Saddles (-17) vs Pillows: This is going to be like a bus crash. Ugly. There's nothing to see here, move along. But of course we'll have to watch. The Saddles made things interesting by starting the Steelers defense (ha!) based on last week's mirage of a performance against the Ravens. Last night against the Vikings they looked like swiss cheese and posted a -3. His lone healthy RB, Najee Harris, after a first half in which he was nolo contendere, rallied in the second half and finished with 22. Blayze's other RB, Darrell Henderson, may not even play Sunday, and with Jonathan Taylor on a bye week his lone recourse is James Robinson, also questionable. So the Saddles might be fishing on Sunday morning in a very shallow free agent RB pool. The bye week also has the Saddles desperate at QB, staring Cam Newton. If this is not a perfect storm for a failure, I don't know what is. The good news for Blayze is he's playing the Consortium, which has "Destined for Failure" on the back of their helmets this season. It's "Deandre Hopkins and Pray for Rain" for Matt Huey's team. Sure, maybe the New Orleans QB (Taysom Hill? Tyrod Taylor? Archie Manning?) will have a big day. And maybe early-Christmas-miracle-No. 2 will happen and his RB tandem of Mike Davis and Darrell Williams will score big. And maybe monkeys will fly out of somebody's butt. Saddles by 12.

Recliners (-18) vs Rangers: Well, you saw what the Rangers did last week when they were underestimated. They creamed the Beaters. Will the same thing happen to the Recliners? No, even though they are starting OBJ and should lose for that reason alone. And since John Lambert doesn't even read this shit, Beaters by 12.

Band Aids (-8) vs Gerbils: Don't let that early 22-point lead fool you... Chuck Nelson has no desire to win this game. He's after the first pick in the draft and can start salting that away by scoring as few points as possible in this one. Sure, he got 13 points from the Vikings QB and 9 from Chase Claypool in the Thursday night game, but the Band Aids have Aaron Rodgers, Alvin Kamara and Josh Jacobs going, so we'll see. For now, Band Aids by 12.